How the Delightful Rapper and I will ensure that we stop losing our small electronic gadgets, jewelry, keys & shoes:
- Upholster entire apartment in velcro and institute a “you put it down, you stick it on the wall” house rule. Also has potential application for soundproofing.
- Contract someone to build a central homing system that displays the location of lost items regardless of whether or not they are on, or have any electronic properties whatsoever. Also useful for revealing where that smell is coming from, and what happened to that sandwich from last week.
- Develop a technology that causes objects to automatically teleport back to a central location once disused for 15 minutes or more.
- Abandon this wholly unzenlike attachment to “things” we have.
If you see DR’s phone, please let us know.
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